Sexpert Spotlight with Tawney Seren

Meet Tawney Seren, a sex educator, blogger, and author reigning from the Pacific Northwest. With over a decade of experience in the sex industry, she loves to have conversations about sex education, masturbation, sex toys, and above all: Nerdisms. She is a firm believer that masturbation is an expression of self-love and educates through her blog at: Openbobsbb.com

How did you get your start working in the field of sexual health and wellness? 

I was going to school for my MA in Marriage and Family Counseling and found that I wanted to get into sex therapy. However, I was very disconnected from sex work and the sex industry. I started investigating different ways in which I could get involved. I had never been shy about my body or talking sex and fell easily into the adult industry after stumbling upon cam rooms, finding my own self-confidence and voice while doing so. In these rooms there were sexy, powerful people that knew what they wanted to relay to their rooms and shared their personal experiences. I saw discussions happening I had never engaged in before and right away I was sold! 

Can you share about the various roles you have within the industry and how you feel they compliment each other? 

I started working in the sex industry as a performer and content creator. During the decade in sex work I was constantly asked questions about sex and toys, soon realizing that one person’s common sense was hardly ever another's. I used the questions and my experience talking about sex in my chat room to then begin creating sex education videos on YouTube, blogs on my personal site, and articles for companies. 

I believe my experience in speaking candidly with others about sex truly paved the way to what I do now and I am honored to have had that experience in the adult industry. It truly did pave the way to my current journey and dreams. 

What do you enjoy most about the kind of work that you do?

I truly believe I am helping people with a very intimate part of their lives and themselves. Assisting others and helping them navigate through their personal pleasures or leading them in the right direction so they can find something themselves is truly a joy for me. I love seeing how many people are out there looking to educate and help, opening the door for those who have not been able to ask the questions previously that they have wanted to. 

What do you wish people better understood about sexual health, pleasure and sex work? 

I wish people would understand that embracing sexual health and pleasure is normal and healthy. Delighting in your own body and what you like can help you better articulate your needs in the bedroom and with yourself. 

I also believe there are huge stigmas around sex work and sex workers must be respected. Sex work IS work, not something that can be done easily for some extra money and I believe there are a lot of pre-conceived notions that have evolved from internalized whorephobia. 

Your advice for those wanting to introduce using pleasure products into their relationship: 

First: Communication is key! Be sure to sit down in a comfortable environment (not intoxicated) and discuss the pleasure products and sensations you wish to bring in. It’s important for your partner to know that the toys are not replacing anything, merely bringing different sensations and options into your play. 

Second: I recommend starting with items that are a bit more ‘mainstream’. Bring in a new massage oil or lubrication, or perhaps blindfolds! Something that the media and the world around us might advertise as a staple item during play. This is a fantastic baby step that can lead to bringing in more sensations and toys in the future! Don’t jump in with something that might intimidate your partner right away. Baby steps and communication!  

What improvements would you like to see made in the pleasure product industry?

I want to see more companies getting rid of the ‘his, hers’ sections on their toys and sites. There are so many beautiful toys that can be used by all and gendering them is not at all necessary. Toys are designed for pleasure, not to exclude anyone. I believe that putting them into categories based around body parts is a necessary step in the right direction. 

I would also love to see more talks around what toys can do aside from just ‘getting you off’. Touching yourself is a beautiful way to connect with your body, assists in stress relief, sleep, and so many other benefits. Sexual wellness is something that can be embraced from all different corners of the mind and should not be put in one single box.

What lasting impression do you want people to have of your contribution to the sexual health and wellness industry? 

I want to feel comfortable talking about their pleasure and toy use. It’s healthy and something beautiful that we can enjoy for ourselves and with others. I want to feel as though I have contributed to a space that provides a comfortable environment for others to discuss their questions about sex and self-pleasure. If someone out there sees my videos or content and it helps them have that conversation, I will feel as though I have made the impression I desire. 

Sex has always been something I felt comfortable talking about and discussing with others, and to be able to reach so many people from all around the world is a beautiful thing. 

What is a little known fact about you? 

I am a roller derby girl! I absolutely love physical sports and being on skates often makes me feel more comfortable than being on my feet alone! Any chance I have I am out trail skating or with my team. I cannot wait until we are all out of lockdown so we can play once more. 

What is your favorite pleasure product of all time? 

My favorite pleasure product of all time is the Magic Wand Rechargeable. It has a flexible neck so I’m easily able to use it externally while being penetrated and my husband also loves the vibrations! Whether it’s a sore back or for playtime, it’s my go-to toy and my ‘beside the bed’ necessity! 

Where can our readers find you online? 

You can find me on my sex education blog: Openbobsbb.com

Twitter: Tawneydarling

YouTube: Youtube.com/tawneyseren

TikTok: @TawneySeren