Fingering is one of the most overlooked and undervalued sex acts (and YES, it is a sex act), but we at Betty’s think that’s a crying shame. Whether you’re experiencing it solo or with a partner, there is so much pleasure to be had from fingering when you give it the time and attention it deserves. There is nothing quite like watching your partner writhe in pleasure when you do it really well and for solo discovery, nothing is quite as intimate. So, with that in mind, let’s dive in and look at some techniques that will get some toes curling.

WHAT IS FINGERING

At its most basic, fingering is using fingers to stimulate various parts of a vulva: the clitoris, g-spot, vagina, vaginal lips etc. For many vulva owners, fingering is their first sexual experience, whether it’s solo experimentation or a first tentative foray with a partner.

WHY IS FINGERING AWESOME

• It’s quieter than a vibrator
• You don’t need batteries or a charging cable
• It’s a great way to get in touch with your body and how it finds pleasure
• You don’t need a partner to find your pleasure
• It’s a great alternative to penis in vagina sex
• It’s a great way to achieve orgasm: 80% of women can’t orgasm from penis in vagina sex
• Such intimate touch brings a real level of closeness between partners
• You will be able to feel your/your partner’s clitoris and g-spot in a way you can’t with penis in vagina sex
• Fingers are powerful but also very sensitive so you will feel every nuance and quiver

GREAT FINGERING TIPS

Forget what you see in porn! Depictions of fingering in porn are often forceful, fast, rough on the clitoris, and with little consideration to the g-spot.

Communicate with your partner. Tell them if you are enjoying something and let them know if you are not. For the fingering partner, ask questions. Harder? Softer? Faster?

Keep fingernails clean and short to reduce the possibility of injury or infection

If you or your partner are not creating adequate natural lubrication (which is completely common, by the way), use some water based personal lubricant.

Start slowly and gently by caressing the outer lips and vulva to create excitement and anticipation

Use a gentle touch on the clitoris with circular motions at first to see what is most comfortable, then increase in speed and intensity according to what you feel.

For vaginal stimulation, use your fingers slowly and gently to enter

Crook your fingers up in a ‘come hither’ motion to discover the g-spot and stoke it rhythmically

NEXT LEVEL FINGERING IDEAS

If you think your fingering game is already on point, why not kick it up a notch with some of these products recommended by Betty’s staff.

Wicked Simply Aqua Jelle Water Based Lubricant is fantastically thick and will stay where you put it, which is great for applying to the fingertips and then massing into the clitoris or vaginal opening.

CG Oh Gee G-Spot Gel Stimulant is meant to be inserted into the vagina and onto the g-spot where it tingles and heightens the blood flow and arousal in the area for some intense added stimulation.

Simple and True Silicone G-Spot Finger Extender does exactly as-advertised. This extra-long finger extension has a strap to keep it in place and gives you or your partner that extra reach your may need for some fabulous g-spot action. This is particularly great for solo fingering if you have reach problems or mobility issues

On Clitoral Arousal Oil Original by Sensuva is going to get your clitoris really humming with its powerful natural botanical formula. The tingling sensation also helps with blood flow, clitoral arousal and can help you create more natural lubrication.

Marvelous Arouser Waterproof Finger Vibrator is a powerful vibrating sleeve worn on the index finger which will take your fingering to mind blowing levels. The sleeve is textured and waterproof with ten vibration functions making it great for some extra stimulation or to relieve tired digits.